Thailand to India

We flew from Bangkok Thailand to Bangalore India last night.  Even on the airplane I could feel the difference in cultures, as the flight attendants and most of the passengers were obviously Indian.  It’s a little hard to describe, but I’ll try.

Riding an elephant - Karen village near Chiang Rai

 

In Thailand, most people were quite sweet and polite, smiling, eager to please, gentle.  However, almost none spoke English, even in tourist areas and restaurants, tour bus companies, taxi drivers and so on.  I could not imagine being a Thai person employed in a tourist-oriented job, and not even attempting to learn a little English, French, German and the languages of my customers.  But in most parts of Thailand, there was little or no English spoken or written. In the temples there were lots of signs filled with information, all in Thai, and almost none in English.  So it was difficult to go deeper in understanding the culture and traditions of the Thai people.

Red Jahu Village near Chiang Rai

Things generally work in Thailand.  The roads are good, the power stays on, Internet is everywhere, the food is wonderful even in the cheapest local restaurants, and people seem to be happy and reasonably well off.  We don’t see a lot of begging, people living on the street, or abject poverty.  The food is safe to eat, even on the street, and restaurants always provide bottled water.  Beer, wine and liquor are readily available and quite cheap by North American standards.  I will say that things in Thailand are more expensive than in most places in India.  Still a lot cheaper than North America, but more expensive than what we are used to in India, Mexico, Guatemala and so on.

The Grand Palace - Bangkok

There is an orderliness about the Thai people.  They seem eager to please, welcoming and smiling from the various shops, restaurants and massage parlours.  To me, the smile seems slightly forced at times, and I wonder what some Thai people say when our backs are turned.  I did see one storekeeper sneer after some Israeli tourists left without buying anything, so it made me think about the level of sincerity of the Thai friendliness.  This quality made me somewhat uncomfortable, as there seemed to be a falseness with our interactions, and a sense of doubt crept in that perhaps it was more about our money than our being there.  Still, my main impression of Thai people was positive.

Buddha's birthday - Temple in Bangkok

There is also a shrill quality to the Thai interactions.  The voices are often quite loud, and have a sing-song quality.  The women often have strident voices, they speak with authority and seem to be strong and independent.  Unlike India, the women are everywhere on the streets, in the shops and restaurants, and the younger ones flash lots of skin and are not shy to show their beauty.  And of course, Thailand is legendary for the sex trade, and I saw hundreds of “farang” (white foreigners) men walking with younger Thai women, and it seemed clear to me that the women were paid for their company.  We passed many “hostess bars” with skimpily-dressed women dancing and beckoning men to join them.  We also saw many “lady-boys” similarly engaged.  This is all done in the open, and with little criticism by the Thai people or authorities.

The streets of Bangkok

When we landed in Bangalore, the words that immediately came to mind were: ramshackle, topsy-turvy, messy, crazy, dirty, noisy, lots of horns honking, people in a hurry to get places, even pushing to get off the plane even before the doors were open.  People are friendly, smiling, and they are a little bruising and rude as well.  English is spoken and seen everywhere.  (That’s a relief!)  Of course, India is familiar to me, it’s my third visit in the past four years, so I am comfortable within the craziness.  I can see how it could be overwhelming for others, and how being in Thailand could be easier for many western “farangs.”  For me, I love having the experience of both countries, and am amazed at how different they are, though they are close physically (our direct flight lasted 3 ½ hours).

This morning I accompanied Henry on his motorbike to the nearby village to pick up idly, a breakfast cake common in South India, made from rice and mung bean flour accompanied by a spicy chutney, and bring it back to the Gurukula for breakfast for everyone.  As I stood outside the stall, people smiled their welcome to me.  There was nothing in it for them, they were genuinely happy to see a westerner visiting their little village.  They are proud of their home, and appreciate our visiting.

There is more of a traditional life here in India.  Spiritual life is a daily living experience for most people and it is open and shared.  Of course, on the one hand, the old traditions include some practices that I find abhorrent, especially when it comes to the treatment and attitude towards women.  And on the other hand, western influence is growing, and in many places, for better or worse, the Indian traditions are being watered down.  Consumerism grows, the young generation is breaking free of the old ways, spiritual practices are waning for many, and people are experiencing individual freedom (in some places) more than ever.  This is a mixed blessing and curse.

I realize that I am comparing an elephant to a mouse (sort of like comparing US and Canada).  Though there are similarities and though they are geographically close, we must remember that Thailand is a nation of 66 million people or so, living in a monarchy and nominal democracy that has never been conquered or colonized by European or North American empires.  India is a vast sub-continent of over a billion people, with more than 20 major language and cultural groups loosely banded together in a very messy democracy, and this only for the past 70 years or so.  In other words, though it is an ancient culture or group of cultures, it is a very young country.  Before that, it was colonized by England and other European countries, and the influence of the British Raj in particular is clearly evident today.

We feel completely welcome here, as if we are coming home.  I suppose if we visit Thailand again and know what to expect, we may find it more easy and comfortable.  But India does feel more like home to me.

Now we are settling in to the Gurukula, being with our dear friends who live here, and trying to help get ready for Guru Pooja next week.  Happy to be here!

Limeleaf Eco-Lodge, Chiang Rai Province, Thailand, Feb 2014

Now I get it!  As beautiful and wonderful as Thailand has been, I have felt I was missing something.  Then I saw a poster in a breakfast café in Chiang Mai for this place called Limeleaf Eco-lodge, a couple of hours northeast of Chiang Mai.  It was not so easy to get to, and we left our big suitcase at the owner’s house in the village, then climbed 800 metres uphill to the lodge, with suitcase, backpack, bags and guitars.

The air is clear, the mountains are beautiful, and we are surrounded by Lahu villages.  The Lahu are hill tribe people who migrated south from China, Tibet and the surrounding areas over the past 200 years.  Now the King has provided them with land and papers so they will stay in their villages and farm.  Totally by accident we arrived at the beginning of the Lahu and Chinese New Year celebrations.

The Lahu get dressed up in bright-coloured costumes, headdresses, gold chains, and all ages celebrate with a dancing circle that goes on all night, and during the day as well.  The men dance in a line, holding hands, and stamping left foot, right foot, step back, step forward in a pattern that can vary in 32 different forms.

The numbers swell, the costumes get brighter and more elaborate, and neighbouring villages arrive to honour the holiday and celebrate together, dancing in the spirit circles and setting off firecrackers almost non-stop.  They are happy, yet serious about honouring the nature spirits with their dance.  During the first day, a pig is sacrificed to send away the evil spirits and bring luck for the New Year.  I think I’ve eaten more pork in the past three days than in my whole life before that! – Oh well, holy pork! (Not really.)

There is a community of volunteers here at Limeleaf, working five hours a day five days a week for room and board.  They are building mud huts, working the vegetable gardens, and hanging out.  They are from all over the world, Germany, France, US, UK and other places.  There is a pool table, lots of Thai beer, a sweat lodge and dunking pool!  The lands are so beautiful, I could sit here for weeks!

Chris, an Englishman who lives and works here six months a year, and Noi, our Thai host and manager, work hard to make sure both we and the volunteers have everything we need.  They feed us, pamper us, take us on excursions to see the dancing, and to waterfalls and other Lahu villages.  We have extended our stay here till tomorrow (Sunday), and today is a chill and relax day (Don’t make us climb the hill again today!). Then the owner, Winay, will take us on an excursion to an elephant camp in a Karen tribal village.  We’ll spend the night there, then head onto Chiang Rai the next morning, where we’ll spend the day before boarding the overnight bus to Bangkok.

Our time is winding down in Thailand, and here at Limeleaf I feel I have finally arrived!

Gurukula

Happy Valentine’s day.  After an overnight bus trip from Pondicherry to Bangalore (sleeper bus, quite comfortable, except for the really bad patches of road), we stickhandled our way through the local buses to get to Oso Dodi Gate, where the Gurukula is located.

A Gurukula is a place partially supported by followers of a guru based in Varkala, Kerala.  They have other spaces as well, and this one is on twenty acres of land outside Bangalore.  Ma (Margaret) is the one who lives here and manages everything.  Visitors come during the year, and especially on this weekend for the annual Guru Puja, where the guru comes and people come from all over to celebrate and hear his words.  There has been a legacy of spiritual masters who have influenced this place, starting with Narayan Guru, and the the Nataraj Guru.  The current master, Muni Narayan Prasad, arrives tomorrow morning, and Amy and I will volunteer to help set up the place for an influx of perhaps hundreds of people on Sunday.  There will be music on Saturday night, and I have already played guitar with Abe and Sajeev, Abe playing wonderful bamboo flute and singing simple ragas that I am able to accompany.

This place is beautiful, natural, very simple.  It is a place of contemplation, reading, yoga, and helping with the cows and gardens, preparing food for people, setting up canopies for the yoga space and some tents for people to stay.  There are many other animals here too, four dogs, three cats, many varieties of birds and butterflies.  Tonight we watched the quarter moon setting to the west, and it was quiet and peaceful.  I am really enjoying my time here already, and looking forward to Guru Puja and beyond.

Ma is an amazing woman, yet another “little guru”.  She is older, but looks very young, beams with love and light, and works through everything that needs to be done in this busy place.  Things are hard to get done, with workers making promises and then not showing up.  In the past two weeks, with financial help from donations, she was able to install a new pump for the drinking water well, so we now have fresh clean well water that is safe to drink.  The cow provides milk, paneer, yogourt, and food for the two new calves born a couple of months ago.

We also met Ma’s daughter and son-in-law, Manjeri (Manju) and Henry.  They are a wonderful couple who have many “children”, including several species of animals, dogs, cats, and even a pet monkey.  However a traumatic think happened today to Mommy Manju.  Her pet monkey, Rhea, suddenly got sick and died after Manju and Henry left them with people to come here.  Rhea was rescued at a few days old, when here mother was killed.  She ended up coming home with Manju and Henry, and as they said, she is more human than most humans.  Her sudden death was the loss of a child for them.  The are taking the bus back to Hyderebad to deal with the situation, and to make sure there is no virus that can spread to other animals in the household.  They will return by bus tomorrow night, arriving Saturday morning.  What an intense day for them (and us).  Our love goes out to them.

More to come on Gurukula experience.  (Sorry no pictures – our camera was stolen!)

Tiruvanammalai

Where to begin?  It’s been a while since I’ve posted a blog, because the Internet has been either absent or very intermittent.  We were spoiled in Kochi, with steady Internet at our homestay.  Since then, we were off the grid completely in Kodaikanal, even without cell reception for four days.  Then in Madurai, there was no wifi.  Now, here in Tiru, we have wi-fi in our room, sometimes, and we never know when it will work and when it won’t.  Frustrating, but I just have to let go.

Over the past week, there haven been so many adventures, I’ll never catch up.  So I will write about here, Tiruvanammalai, home to a magic mountain, Arunachal.  The road from Madurai to Tiru is very flat.  Then as we approach Tiru, the mountain Arunachal looms above the town, where legend says Shiva manifested.  Magic mountain, power spot, this place is a magnet for spiritual seekers from all over the world.  Here is where Sri Ramana Maharshi was drawn at 16 years old.  He spent many years living in and around a cave on the Arunachal mountain, silent, ascetic, meditating.  Years!  Then, responding to the urgings of many disciples, he came down and started to establish an ashram at the foot of the mountain, which is the main centre drawing people from all over the world, to meditate, pray, chant. The guru died in 1950, and his legacy lives on.  He spoke little, and when he did it was in simple language.  He didn’t talk philosophy or Bhagavadgita or Vedas.  He said: “Who am I?”  He taught people to seek the True Self within.  That is all.  He never sought disciples or followers, didn’t want to be called guru, he only wanted to life a simple, ascetic life.  To me, he was “the real thing”.

Arunachal from the bus stand in Tiru

The energy of the devotees is very intense, though I must say, most are absorbed in their own practice, and quite honestly, most are unfriendly, even miserable-looking.  I don’t quite get it.  “If you are doing so much spiritual work, why are you so miserable?” Amy says.  Still, I do sense a mystical energy here that affects me as well.

We have spent four days here in Tiru.  We climbed to the caves on Arunachal, sat and meditated with many devotees, and visited the ashram and heard wonderful chanting.  Still I didn’t feel very comfortable.  I wasn’t really “getting it”.

Kids near the ashram on the way up Arunachal

Then we went to visit a friend of Sajee’s.  Anand is from Kerala, he married a western woman named Gayathri and is raising two sons.  He came to live in Tiru five years ago and bought some land outside of town, facing the mountain.  He is gradually building an organic permaculture farm, growing many varieties of fruit trees, vegetables, with a cow.  He also built a simple “open studio” and several huts where people who are meant to come would stay for days or even months.  He and his family live a beautiful simple peaceful life.  Gayathri is a very accomplished visual artist and potter, and is preparing a gallery exhibition of her work for Kashi Café and Art Gallery in Kochi (we were there), and then another in Cuenca, Spain (we were there too many years ago!).

On the day we went to visit Anand we got up early and rode our bikes to the farm for 7 am Yoga with Krika, a visitor from Italy who is living there.  After, we sat with Anand for several hours, and I could have just stayed.  I felt so fulfilled, so peaceful, and was touched by the magic of Arunachal.  I felt Anand spoke to my soul.  He seemed to identify my particular mind-space at that moment, and I learned valuable lessons from him.  He spoke about just being, not doing.  Of course, he said, there is much to do, but once we let go of our need for ego gratification, our need to be recognized for our “achievements”, everything in life is a meditation.  “I could tie the cow to the post, instead I walk with the cow – cow meditation.  I could build an irrigation system, instead I carry small buckets of water and water the plants and trees by hand – water meditation.  I have no need to prove anything to anyone.  Here, I experienced ‘death’ and ‘annihilation’ of my ego self, and now I am only here with Arunachala, and I am very happy and peaceful.”

Sitting with Anand and Amy facing Arunachala, I got it completely.  I realized I could easily stay here for months.  We will return.

Temple Elephant in Tiru

Of course, as everywhere in India, there are many contradictions.  In town, big signs were posted all over announcing the death of a very important man.  Apparently two thousand people came to his funeral to pay their respect.  There were lots of fireworks, an elaborate procession with music.  It turns out (someone said) he was the biggest crime boss in the area!

Sadhus at the Temple

And there are so many miserable-looking western “seekers”, unfriendly, “self”-absorbed, no smiles, nothing.  Because of the very strong presence in Tiru, many local people have become jaded and also unfriendly.  For the first time ever in India, the host of our homestay was nasty, miserly and unkind. 

There are hundreds of people persistently begging all the time.  This is a town where there are many many ashrams offering free food to everyone daily.  One time Amy bought some chai for a woman begging, to avoid giving money.  She smiled gratefully, and after she drank the chai, she came back to Amy and asked for money again.  It never ends.

Tiru is a magic place, and like everywhere in India, is full of contradictions.  It’s everything!

Next stop, Pondicherry.

Leaving Fort Cochin

Ginger Restaurant Jewtown with Amy

Our time is almost up in Fort Cochin, though we return for a few days in March before we fly home.

It’s hard to describe how wonderful this place is.  Though people are friendly all over India, especially when you get out of the biggest cities, here is even friendlier!  Many mornings I park myself on a bench at the beach to write, contemplate and watch the ships pass through the channel.  I see Sandia there each morning, since it is her spot to clean on the beach.  We have become friends.  This morning she approaches and says “Uncle (!), do you remember the words I taught you in Malayalam?  Name?”  I say “Peyre!”, she taught me that.  She asks about our children and about where we live, and tells me about her two children, of whom she is clearly very proud.  I will miss Sandia.

And each morning I pick up a little cardboard cup of masala chai from Sobehr.  He knows I don’t want sugar, and so makes a fresh batch for me without my asking.  Yesterday we were at the repair shop of our bicycle man Kumarek.  As we left a “2-wheeler” scooter pulls over, and it’s Sobehr, who saw us on the side of the road, and had to stop to say hello.

Cherrai Beach with Amy

It’s a little sad to leave, and my heart is filled with gratitude for our time here and for the fabulous people we have come to know.  We’ll be back I know.

Paul on the bike

One of the greatest gifts of our Cochin time has been Yoga with Sajee.  Sajee is a Yoga Master, and Yoga is life, not just postures.  I want to remember his teachings, and integrate them into my life.  In a way, it’s nothing new, all spiritual teachings lead to the same place.  Yet I am learning from Sajee and it’s sticking.  Some sayings (approximate):

We are all lonely travellers in this world.  We are born alone and we die alone.  We spend a few minutes with each other.  When we love someone, we are really loving ourselves.  We can only really love ourselves.  This is our purpose.  We are one in the cosmic conscious (sic).

In the child pose, he says: “Feel that you are an unborn baby in the mother’s womb.  We’re not doing anything, all is provided for us by the cosmic conscious.  We breathe the oxygen, we do not make it, it is given to us.  We eat food, we do not create it, it is provided.  If we can be like the newborn baby, then we experience the true self, and remove the ego.  Ego says ‘I did this, this is mine, this is not yours, I am this, you are that.’ All illusion.  If we are free from Ego and duality, all is one in the cosmic conscious.”

Paul and Sajee Backwaters

I have received a lot of healing energy from Yoga, Ayurvedic Massage (thank you Vivek!), and from living in Fort Cochin among these wonderful friends. 

Paul and Sandia

Thank you India, thank you Sajee, thank you Fort Cochin.

Men and Women

I try not to be judgemental.  I have a hard time accepting some things about Indian culture.  Gender roles are ultra-defined.  Women’s roles are strictly set out, and “happily” adhered to by most.  One wife wakes up at 4:30 am to make sure she has time to prepare lunch for her husband before he leaves for work at 7:30.  When she was ill and spent two days in hospital, her husband and son checked into a hotel.  God forbid they should actually make food for themselves for two days – just not done.

Sandia's Family and Neighbours

Many men work away from home.  In one family, the husband works in Dubai, and only comes home to Kochi for two weeks a year at Christmas time.  This is normal and common.

Boys and men frolic on the beach, swimming and playing together, in bathing suits and western clothing.  Women watch.  A couple of them may go in the water, fully clothed in their traditional saris.  This is normal, and totally accepted.

Most don’t know how to swim, though they are surrounded by water.  A houseboat in Allepei tipped at the dock, and two children and two women died, and many were injured.  We heard of another tragedy, where 40 children from 10 to 12 years of age were on a field trip from school, on a wooden boat with a capacity for 20 people.  The boat sunk and dozens died.  They couldn’t swim, and there were only a couple of life jackets, not in use.

We saw a celebration in Munnar with 25 women dancing freely together – the husbands were nowhere to be seen.  If they were there, the women could not be free to dance, since the husbands would not like other men to see “their women” dancing.  Only when the men are not around are the women free to “party”.

Women Dancing

On the buses, women sit at the front, men in the rear.  Even Amy and I separate in deference to the custom.  Why?

In the little restaurants, dozens of men sit, no women to be seen.  They are at home, cooking and cleaning for their families.

Whatever the man says, this is what is done.  Yet the women appear strong, happy and not meek.  Most seem to accept this reality, without question.

If a woman is divorced or widowed, there is usually no consideration of remarriage, and even if there are children, they are left to provide for them alone, often with extreme deprivation.  We did hear that in the Muslim community, a brother of the husband or other family member might marry the woman – perhaps an additional wife – to provide.  But in the Hindu tradition, this is not done.

Men leave their wives, and there is nothing to be done, no help, no support.  To me it seems unfair, but in this world, it is accepted as what is.  My western judgement (discernment?) cries out that this is completely unfair, but I don’t know if it’s seen that way here.  It’s hard to fathom.

Yet, the people seem happy, so friendly, warm and genuine.  Perhaps it is the daily spiritual connection that allows them to accept what is with grace and make the best of it.  I don’t often hear complaints, but do experience their sense of gratitude to God or the Cosmos for life, however it is presented.

Children rarely cry, except for very young babies.  They seem content, happy with their family life, and curious to meet us “fresh monkeys”.  Yet we hear that children are beaten (the “bamboo massage”) and this is acceptable, as long as it is done to teach and not because of uncontrolled anger.  We hear stories of rape of daughters by fathers, and sometimes these things are reported and dealt with, sometimes not.  Sometimes the mothers say and do nothing to stop it.

So many contradictions and questions.  It's hard to avoid judgement, but I try.

Munnar

One of our favourite activities here in Cochin is spending time with our Yoga teacher Sajee and his family.  On weekends, we go on little excursions to places nearby.  This weekend we were more adventurous.  Sajee’s wife Ajee took a half-day “leave” from her work, and we picked her up in Ernakulum in the Tata car with Vinaya, their 14 year-old daughter.  Then we headed out to Munnar, a four-hour journey through the Western Ghats (mountains).  The travel was a little tortuous – the roads are quite atrocious once you get away from the big towns like Ernakulum.  Potholes, narrowed stretches, and even the areas that are not damaged are so narrow we have to pull over to let a bus pass.  And this is the main road to Munnar, a very popular tourist hill station.

Travels with Sajee and family

We stopped along the way, for lunch, to stretch, to see some of the nice scenic views in the hills.  Once we had travelled for about an hour, the mountains begin, the road twists and turns, and for once, there is space between towns, forests, open spaces, and lots of green everywhere.  It starts to get cooler as we go to higher elevations – ahhh – we’ve been hot for a month, this is such a pleasant change.

We finally arrive in Munnar at around 6 pm, and there are no rooms available.  We travel back 8 kms to the previous town called Pallivassar, found a very expensive little hotel (2000 rupees a night = $40!).  Sajee, Ajee and Vinaya took the larger room in the hotel building, so they could bring an extra mattress, and we took a room on stilts, elaborately decorated like a tree house!  It was very small, cute, and when we walked, the room shook!  There was a TV in the room, so we stayed and relaxed for an hour, watching Animal Planet on one of the few English stations.  We learned about the life of rhinoceroses – very interesting.

Tree House

We went for dinner in the larger hotel next door, and as we ate, we heard recorded music playing outside in the back.  A group of about 25 Indian women were celebrating a birthday.  They lit a campfire, and were dancing happily in a circle around the fire.  When one of them came through the restaurant, she invited Amy to come and dance with them.   Vinaya and Ajee joined.  Then they invited me to dance!  I was surrounded by 25 beautiful Indian women, who took turns dancing with me.  Wow!

 

After, we went back to our room to sleep in the nice cool room.  I awoke in the middle of the night to a new sensation – silence!  Fort Cochin, though a small town, is always noisy.  The fans are always going to combat the heat, there is A/C next door, there are dogs barking, horns honking – cars, tuk tuks and “2 wheelers” -  people’s voices very early in the morning, loud crows and other birds.  Usually I wear earplugs.  Here, it was so nice and quiet – peace.  At least until 6:15 when the church up the road starting blasting morning devotional music in Malayalam!  Wake up!!

We went back to Munnar for breakfast, then we went “trekking” in the tea plantations.  We walked up the hillside for at least an hour, till there were no people, only birds and trees and tea bushes everywhere.  Sajee went for a stroll and saw a cobra.  We walked, we talked, we sat, it was wonderful!  Talks with Sajee are often Satsang.  He speaks about what is real life – freeing ourselves from the “golden veil” of  pleasure and illusion, liberating ourselves to find the true unity of Self with Cosmos.  I say: “I understand that as a goal, but it’s not even my goal in life, at least not at this time.  I want to be here, to experience the pain and pleasures, to live fully on this earth, hopefully with little moments of realization of the true Self. “  He said: “Those moments are for those who have experienced cosmic conscious(ness).  You know what is Truth, and when it is time, you will be ready to be liberated.” 

 As we descended back towards town, Ajee stopped to talk to a local villager, and she invited us to her home for tea.  We learned that she works for the tea plantation owners, they provide the house for 13 years for their workers.  She earns 150 rupees per eight hour day ($3), her husband is away, she has three children, must pay for school, medicine and all.  We gave her some rupees (she didn’t want to take them, but we convinced her it was a gift, not payment for tea and hospitality), and we went on our way.

On our way home, we again made several stops to break up the long journey.  Our last stop was a bird sanctuary.  By the time we got there, it was almost closing time, so we decided to just walk around the sanctuary – the birds would also fly outside the sanctuary, wouldn’t they?  We did see some very nice water birds, egrets, colourful kingfishers, ducks, as well as some land animals, some that looked like reindeer, water buffalos, and so on.  Again we stopped to talk to some locals at a “Toddy” shop.  Toddy is an alcoholic drink made from coconut flowers, and so we sampled it, a couple of sips anyway, then took the rest home in a bottle.  As we were leaving, the proprietors shouted and pointed up the hill, and there was a wild elephant strolling through the woods – yet was another highlight of our trip – our first wild elephant sighting!

Time spent with Sajee and his family is precious, soon our time will be up in Cochin, and we will have these many special moments as memories.